Call 911- I Have FIRE in MY MOUTH!!!

At The Heaven on Seven Restaurant in Chicago.
I was in Seventh Heaven! Hot sauce of all sizes, shapes, tastes and strength surrounded me. My salivary glands were working with the thought of getting an endorphin rush from a few added drops of red liquid to my meal.

I loved the sign!


And the atmosphere...

And the illustrations...

And the exhibits. This outfit was worn by Tom Arnold at Mardi Gras.

The deep-fried, shredded sweet potato was fabulous!

And then there was other forms of entertainment...here's my brother Fredi trying to earn some mardi gras beads!

I had tried at least 9 different types of hot sauces...and either my taste buds were dead, or they just weren't giving me that adrenalin rush. I figured anything with an "a_ _" on the label would give me a kick. But no luck.

So Fredi requests for the "behind the counter- out of sight" hot sauces. And the waiter, with much concern, pleads that I try just a very small dot (of the "Da Bomb" hotsauces). I tried one bottle, and nothing happened out of the ordinary- so I tried the next. And I had a major delayed reaction!

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***Fredi, finds joy in showing this video to his friends and has been waiting for me to blog this. So here it is Fredi- happy now? huh?

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WATCH THE VIDEO- if you want to see REAL pain!

Yup! Now I really understood those screaming faces on the bottles...

I really thought I was going to pass out. I wanted to crawl under the table, pour water on my head, and run frantically through the restaurant, all the while screaming. It was somewhat of a relief that Derek, the paramedic, was there just in case... and he told me to put salt on my tongue- but man! that really hurt, and did not help a bit. So I excused myself and paced back and forth in the handicap bathroom stall. Just looking at myself in the mirror reflected back a puffy-eyed, red-faced, swollen and blotchy me! I just wanted to curl up and lay out my tongue on the cold floor just to get some relief.

Alas- I was able to walk out with some composure.

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On leaving the restaurant, I overlooked this billboard on their door. I just survived Da Bomb Ground Zero ranked 5 (on a 5 rank system and described as "Hot as a Mutha") . It's always wise to read signs first, right? Duh, I'll remember this next time around.